Re: BULLS#!T Chronicles! Written by japsa, about some a$$hole :UPDATED 04/11/09

by **Peanutbutters** Tue Nov 03, 2009 10:01 pm

Damn! you are one fucked up boy!

by **knife in a box** Tue Nov 03, 2009 10:01 pm

Same here Sajex

If I get in a fight the other person is fucking dead and for my size it's an embarrassment to them (Except the kids who are like a foot and a half taller than me)

by Sajextryus Tue Nov 03, 2009 10:01 pm

Awesome132 wrote:Damn! you are one fucked up boy!

I say make them feel the pain!

by **Leonhardt** Tue Nov 03, 2009 10:06 pm

Awesome132 wrote:
04-Leonhardt wrote:Yeah, I cry when I punch too, only cause I enjoy the righteous fury flowing through my veins as I strike down those who have caused me Injustice.

And Hiryu is my sword. By black bladed katana with a red tinted edge, a white, banded sheath, and the name: "Leonhardt" inscribed in Japanese on the hilt.

How much money?

Well, I forged the blade myself, carved the wood for the hilt and sheath, and got my asian friend to do the inscribing. Then I painted the sheath, and hilt, which cost about 50 bucks for the good stuf that won't fade or chip off, and got some of that sport-bag strap stuff and used that for the grip. It's actually very well made, says my grandfather who used to make swords for a living, he helped me temper the blade so It won't shatter.

It's been my weapon of choice for every duel I've been in. Hasn't failed me once. Everyone else had crappy, store bought swords that shattered at the first blow from Hiryu.

So all in all, with materials and everything, it cost about 100 bucks. If you like swords, always make em yourself. They're better quality, alot cheaper, and they're special, as they're a part of you.

And yes, Badass is good.

by **knife in a box** Tue Nov 03, 2009 10:08 pm

Wow...I wish I knew how to forge

by **The Joker** Tue Nov 03, 2009 10:13 pm

You know, I taught my self how to do that. We used to have this gel dummy that my mom bought for me to practice with. Well, after 3 years of brutal practicing, the thing was a dump. I had stabbed swords into it, broken the bendy metal on it's neck with nunchucks, and cracked the plastic on the inside of the head with a staff. I decided to dismount it from the stand and wreck it. I told my parents, and they agree that it was a mess.

I started by stepping on it's back and snapping the spine where the nerve "wires" that sent signals to the rest of your body were. Then I got my sword and cleaved it's arms off (I sharpened my sword, or katana if you want to get technical with it). I used the nun chucks to break its neck and to dent its skull. I used the staff to dislocate his jaw and to break 4 out of 5 ribs. I used kamas to stab the eyes, then rip them out of their sockets. I used eskrima sticks to break the rest of the spine. I pull out my katana again and slice of parts of the head one at a time. I then cleave it in half then start slicing and dicing all parts of it's body. It was a mess when I was done.

by **Leonhardt** Tue Nov 03, 2009 10:14 pm

It comes with being Irish.
I'm currently working on some new sword designs...
Like one that has an oil vein through the blade, so you can light it on fire.

And one that shoots an electric current through the blade when you pull a trigger on the hilt.

So far, both of those designs have failed epicly ^^'

or EPIQUE-ly as Alex would say.

by **knife in a box** Tue Nov 03, 2009 10:20 pm

Lol. But a flaming or electric sword would be fucking amazing I would love to see one

by **Leonhardt** Tue Nov 03, 2009 10:22 pm

Which is why I keep trying!

by **knife in a box** Tue Nov 03, 2009 10:23 pm

Yay!

by **Alex** Tue Nov 03, 2009 10:27 pm

......No comment.....

by **The Joker** Tue Nov 03, 2009 10:27 pm

I've designed my own Bo staff. It's made out of metal, and has Japanese inscriptions on the side. If you translate them, they say 'Way of the Dragon'. I used normal metal you find in stores, hammer it down, and use a metal stylus to write the inscriptions. (I have relations to a blacksmith in the French Renaissance. He was one of my ancestors.) Then I use good paint to put a layer over the metal, so if it fades, there's always another layer. I then had my grandpa temper the steel and make the clips that holds the three separate pieces together. I tried it, and it can break 3 blocks of hardwood.

Here's the cool part. It also breaks into 3 pieces. It starts as a staff, then you pull in the middle while pushing a switch and it breaks in two, becoming eskrima sticks. You then pull again, causing it to turn into nunchucks.

by **Leonhardt** Tue Nov 03, 2009 10:28 pm

Neat, reminds me of that Bald guy's Zan-pak-to from Bleach... I forget his name...

*Somewhere, Bald Guy is crying*

by **knife in a box** Tue Nov 03, 2009 10:35 pm

Alex wrote:......No comment.....

Lol

by Sajextryus Tue Nov 03, 2009 11:37 pm

My friend found some steel pipes and he managed to flatten in. Then, his father, who works in house construction, used a tool to sharpen it. Then, he put on some tape for protection to his hands. IT IS SICK!!!

by **japsa** Wed Nov 04, 2009 1:14 am

The Joker wrote:I remember this kid named Shawn at my school who kept telling everyone that I shopped at JCPenney. One day, I asked if he'd heard that his mom was giving blowjobs in the bathroom. Then I said that they had to pump the cum out of that blob that she calls her stomach. You know what he does? He swings at me.

I take it, but I grab his hand. I then twist it until he's on the ground. (I did jijutsu back then) Then I step on his gut as hard as I could. That heaved all of the air out of him, and made him dizzy. I gave him a moment to recover (I haven't lost my honor), then I flip him around with another twist.

"Get on your knees."
"No." he said, coughing.
"NOW, or else."
"Or else what?"

I punch him in the face, then he get's on his knees. I adjust my grip to both hands, then put my foot on his back.

"Now then, you're either gonna quit being an asshole, or I can break your arms like a twig." I said quietly.
"I doubt it."
"Wanna see?"
"Go ahead, you little bitch."

I start slowly pushing his arms up. If I kept going, they would have broken. "Ahhh! Okay, I'll stop, I'll stop!" he screamed. By now nearly everybody at lunch was watching. The proctors were in the other section of the school, by the asphalt. Just to finish off, I let go of his arms and hauled him upward. I grab him on the throat and slam him into a wall. "Now then, let's put a smile on that face!" I let go, rear my hand back, and ram my right fist into his ribs hard enough to break bricks. (Okay, maybe not, but I punched as hard as I could, and I can punch up to about 90-100 pounds.)

To this day, he hasn't messed with me since.

hmmm, how on topic

But to be honest halfway through the story I was expecting to read...

"Get on your knees."
"Now, I'm going to put something in your mouth.
"And you're going to swallow it"
"Then you're going to thank me for it!"

lulz, The Shawshank redemption is awesome

by **japsa** Wed Nov 04, 2009 9:04 am

Wednesday 04th November 2009.

Well, I best start off by saying that this one wont be about the legendary bullshit man, however it will be about bullshit.

So when I got to college is some sick fucked up curiosity I was hoping BSM would be there, but he newer showed up. He was probably going to the moon or having a death race with Ghandi or some cowcrap.

Anyway, remember the Dawley boys? Well today in my last class I sat next to two girls. Sammie very attractive the only problem is most of the time she just has a very miserable facial expression on (she's actually a jolly ol' wench though) and another girl Sharney. Sharney (I'm not sure if the spelling is correct but whatever) Is fucking sexy! Only problem is, she is epiquely stupid, and has the most fucking annoying laugh EVER! So back to the bullshit, The dawley boys actually managed to convince these two stupid broads that there was a riot in Dawley. I'm just sitting there listening to this shit, I couldn't damn believe it! they were seriously believeing him and started asking questions about when it happened, how many there were etc.

Tomorrow is a full day at college and I hope I have another encounter with the BULLSHIT MAN. He's loads mroe entertaining than a bunch of retards chanting "Dawley" and watching a couple of girls almost go in fucking comas deciding whether to beleieve bullshit or not.

BITCHES, try to stay on topic please. Or I will tell the Dawley boyz you wuz dizrespectin dem.

by **Leonhardt** Wed Nov 04, 2009 5:00 pm

Those Dawley boys can suck the fattest, most hairy part of my tiny, well toned ass. They're full of shit, and have no idea what a real Gangster is. Not Gangstas, those are just retarded. I'm talking about the Mob. You know, The Italian ~~Job~~ Mob. Not some group of Gangbangers who think they're cool cause they beat eachother up for no goddamned reason.

But whatever. It's funny how you miss the person you hate so much, just so you can feel good by hating them some more. You should probably thank him for all the good times on the last day. You know, just to fuck with him.

by **japsa** Wed Nov 04, 2009 5:03 pm

you're misunderstanding it, The guys who do the Dawley chants are the normal guys. They do it for fun, they're not really part of a gang.

It's the BSM who thinks he's part of a gang

by **Leonhardt** Wed Nov 04, 2009 5:21 pm

He's not part of a gang unless he's ever fired a Tommy Gun.

by **japsa** Wed Nov 04, 2009 5:29 pm

I suggest you look up the definition of "gang".

by **knife in a box** Wed Nov 04, 2009 5:34 pm

04-Leonhardt wrote:Those Dawley boys can suck the fattest, most hairy part of my tiny, well toned ass. They're full of shit, and have no idea what a real Gangster is. Not Gangstas, those are just retarded. I'm talking about the Mob. You know, The Italian ~~Job~~ Mob. Not some group of Gangbangers who think they're cool cause they beat eachother up for no goddamned reason.

But whatever. It's funny how you miss the person you hate so much, just so you can feel good by hating them some more. You should probably thank him for all the good times on the last day. You know, just to fuck with him.

I actually have a cousin in the Italian Mafia, but he got arrested.

I'm being serious.

by **japsa** Wed Nov 04, 2009 5:57 pm

ORLY, SHOW ME YOUR SERIOUS FACE!!!

by **knife in a box** Wed Nov 04, 2009 6:06 pm

I'm being serious.

by **japsa** Wed Nov 04, 2009 6:15 pm

That doesn't look very serious

I SAID, SHOW ME, YOUR SERIOUS FACE!

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